Don’t let education get in the way of learning.

Unlock learning.

“We learn one thing from history: it makes us sad.”

Too old for some things.

“Please bring your final registers to your purchases at this time.”

I can sniff out free pizza in 4 dimensions.

Unlocking lines.

“…and nothing since H[] ended…”
H[]?
<smugly> “Oh, did you not know about H[]?”
No, I knew about you and H[],but I was feigning that I didn’t know what you hadn’t yet told me for the sake of seeing what stories you’d finally decide to tell me.
<laughter replaced by shock replaced by admiration> “For that, I’m paying for dinner.”

It’s like how in movies or TV shows, everything happens at the same time.

There’s a skill to making pancakes. I lack it. It’s almost comical.
One of my deepest secrets- this is up there with that and that and that- is that I don’t know how to make pancakes. Not so much don’t know how, but never have.

Except without the incredulity of coincidence.

“One day I will make perfect pancakes. And they will be good.”
Not only is that a great sentiment, but suddenly the past 2 hours make sense. Well, to me at least. You might be still confused, but if you have 2 out of 3 of {K[], good pancakes, inevitable hangovers} I think you'll be alright.

Let me text this burning secret so we can trade numbers.
“I might have already I given you mine?”
<checks> Yep. Well, here’s mine. <dials the already given number>
“<puzzled by phone not ringing>”
“Hello?”
Well, this is interesting. See, I met this funny cute girl, and apparently she gave me a phony number. What a bitch.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
<hangs up> Looks like you transposed 2 digits.

Phonicus Rex meets Answerusaurus.

It’s a sun-loving fungus that can throw itself over a cow.

“Turn me on…”
I don’t know what I want, and I know what I don’t want.
I document the changes, and change the documentation.
I demonstrate the moves, and move the demonstration.
“…And turn me up…”
I go everywhere.
I do everything.
I live forever.
“…And turn me loose…”
I live in the rush.
I am a whirlwind.
I have a empty house at the corner of today and the past.
“…I am alive…”
I never grow old.
I never grow young.
I want to move.

“Smoothed over like milk…”

Foiled again.

“…Seeing only what was bad / When you tried to feed me…”

hey!!
Hey! (1 !)
1?!
Okay, I'll give you another ! Hey!!
Ohhhh. I couldn't tell what the ! referred to.
The ! referred to a !. It was not a pronounial !.

!

!!!! (in case of emergency)
heh I'll keep them in my pocket.

Serpents twist in biblical gardens, snakes around mystics’ staffs. The human eye sees the spindling strands and cannot comprehend the nature of the aberration before it, limbless wonder terrifyingly fascinating. The seeking of dimensional variance gets jarringly halted by a unidimensional monster. There is no body, no identification, no point of reference once the middle is grabbed, perhaps an inch from the end or perhaps to continue tortuously into labyrinthine coils, a predatory trail that might culminate in a tail, or a venomously fanged head, or simply extend into infinity.

I hate measuring spaghetti portions.

It starts with a b and ends with a q and has an archarts in the in the middle.

Visiting W[] is a lot like going to GenCon, in that it will be fun and I can’t do it this weekend.

Mums the word.

I’m feeling *confrontational*.

Clock in, lock out.

She realized she was trying to put circles into squares, and I was neither.

Saw $9.99, an Israeli/Australian claymation, none of which involve the movie’s essence. In a way that needs no discussion of why, the movie is good. Ending precisely at the scene when I hoped it would certainly counts as an identifiable facet.

Free kittens almost sounds like a good idea.

Tax e-service.

It’s a cross between Labor Day and Christmas.