Having taken cold medicine and naps, I’m feeling better. Yay zeugma.

“Valentine’s Day sucks if you’re single.”
“It also sucks if you’re not.”

Anyone up for a little Lupercalia instead?

Vacuum (second eulogy)

Oft tell the timeless toils of souls now soiled
In times of grief that lie nigh lonely night,
When helpless spotted doth spot new hope spoiled:
Hero lain uncovered ‘mid uncleared blight.
Heartlessly slain upon a heartless day
Ere night ere rise of love’s impassion’d dawn
As heartless lie aggrieved in thoughtless way,
Left silent, warcry turned to fun’ral song.
On evil surface, walked upon unpaved,
Give too much dirt to too much death in dearth.
The worth of wholesome living left unsaved:
Eternal life etern’ly ruin’d by birth.
Never old in dying rust.
Ashes, ashes, dust, dust.

Add this sentence to your profile if you add stuff to your profile because someone else’s profile tells you to do so.

Add this sentence to your profile if you don’t add stuff to your profile because someone else’s profile tells you to do so.

New whiteboard finally mounted at 3pm yesterday. Stop by and give your prediction on how long before this one kills itself.

Not freezing like an ice parrot, or avoiding class like a mixed metaphor. For those who missed me in Village 3, I didn’t not perform.

Ehn. It’s been a bad week.
Out like a bad simile.

Zen counting the days until the weekend. Let me know when I can open my eyes, though I’m probably already asleep.

If it’s Monday, it must be time for tastelessness:
The University of Missouri-Rolla’s mascot is the Miner. So, like we have outside our library a statue of George Washington, they have a statue of a miner, with a hardhat and pickax, only their statue is inside the building we were in. Naturally, I had to have a picking of me molesting the statue, going for the “inappropriate relationship with a miner” joke. Of course, at that point I must follow-up with the “statutory rape” pun, and then I may as well 3-for-3 by “pulling on his tool”.

And then the next improv scene prompt just happens to be “Coal Mine”.

Saw “Trojan Women”, which was, as said by others, most fairly described as “interesting”. Hecuba was too whiny, Talthybius spoke too softly, the genre shifts were too done too abruptly, Helen honestly seemed cast solely for her ability and willingness to pole dance, and the theatre was distractingly too warm. However, Andromache was very good, as was Poseidon, and Chorus A of course contained some excellent performing.

No SI mentions this week, although Rolla’s statue of a miner and his tool evoked a triple of tasteless double entendres, and that was before dinnertime jokes about Ray Charles, Helen Keller, and Nazis in general. I’d repeat them, but I’m already babbling like a bad simile. I’ll provide salacious details when I’m less tired and have located photographic evidence.

Team Poisonous Platypi did remarkably well considering they were but 2 freshman who could not answer a question about Maryland for their lived-in-Maryland-for-most-of-their-lives. In fairness, I did preface by warning I'd be doing some crazy negging.

Anyone up for the ultimate roadtrip: Haugesund, Norway -> Trondheim, Norway, with MSN as the travel agent?

Seriously, I need plans for summer vacation.

[Gr... apparently Microsoft decided to actually fix a bug for a change. As it was, courtesy snopes.]

Mnemonic creation is the ultimate Rorschach test, only sometimes there are wrong answers. For {menw = I wait}, the correct mnemonic is not “men wait for me” but rather “a waiter brings you a menu”.

+1/2 but I’m getting the wrong answer.
My first (partial, though I was activated as a replacement very early) mafia game online (Newbie 76) has been more successful: as a vanilla, I was killed Night 2- with the cop killed Day 1 and the doctor Night 1- but before dying cast enough suspicions on the final mafia member that the town obtained a victory on Day 3.

It's Disneyland.
"No, I think it's Disneyworld."
No, my sister was just there.
"I've seen the commercials."
So have I!
"Should we vote on this?"
"I think it's 'world."
Anyone?
Please?
Fine.

Team Enrobed Milanos by 2 points over the too-tasteless-by-probably-only-a-week Team Tsunami.

I'm sorry, but I can't let you do this. It's 'land.
"Give me the paper."
I had seen the commercials with my sister, and we couldn't tell what they were for, and she was just at Disneyworld and it wasn't that!
"When was she there?"
A week and a half ago!
"Hm."
Look, I'll pay $5- to each of you- if I'm wrong.
"Hm. Okay."
Let me just check see that I have $20.
"Wait, I thought you were sure?"
No, I am. But my sister so owes me $20 if it isn't.

“If you see a mime sometime between now and then do not try and engage him in conversation, instead flee, flee for your very lives.”

I wish someone did get the officer’s name to find out if it were Beth; though since it was a middle school and not a church, discretion would concur that continuing the rapid movement away from the suspicious noises would indeed be most prudent.

*8* consecutive RPS victories in a room of 10 players is pure skill.

“Whistle while you work...”

“One man deserves the credit, / One man deserves the blame...”

Borrowing from Lobachevsky.

“...Only be sure always to call it please 'research'.”

Free pizza/free t-shirt. Probably the only reason I wouldn’t sell my soul for such is that it would be logically impossible.

Danny’s Corollary to Pascal’s Wager
Use who rather than whom.

“I’m guessing the 4x4 matrix is impossible, because otherwise you’d have to spend a long time doing it.”

Continuing Work-Study might be impossible.

Going to Suspicious of Whistlers for free pizza merits a callback?! Clearly I am an expert on intelligence.