There will likely be some kind of final Chanukkah celebration tonight. I’ll guess ~7:30 in Ursa’s Fireside. Bring your menorah, dreidel, gelt, candy canes…

My mad dreidel skills Night 7 (winning 75-10) compensate for my sucking at Candyland, which, in fairness, is likely genetic. I still maintain rock-paper-scissors is a game of total skill. And there is something to be said for the just introduced Guillotine’s killing French people.

Slivered pastry, oh so tasty,
Shrouding cream in candlelight:
Do delay tea, don't be hasty,
Come to kitchen in Forsyth.

With a very soft if rather large acrylic scarf having been abandoned for hours at Ursa’s unto closing time, I’ll try strangulation.

“Yet, another obvious truth is that there must be some catch, otherwise this would not be a studied problem.”

[This was not plagiarized from a stereotypically Duke profile.]

Sometimes it’s a miracle if the candles don’t stay lit.

Q: What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
A: Nothing; for you've already told her twice of the inanity of using a bait and switch tactic to call together to a mandatory discussion allegedly on rape awareness but rather instead on semantics after 10pm on a busy night; thus it's not worth positing that humor, depending on an audience whose sense of humor will have been able to be judged from a period of cohabitation, consists of often defensively mechanistic reflections of observations of oddities of human existence, which in her particular case are based on a pun on connotative versus denotative meanings of "tell" and are only indirectly dependent on the scenario, in that easily identifiable circumstances better expose the double definition.

And who your worst sexual experience was with.

Metaanalytically, I suppose I would be least likely to burn down the dorm (or merely set off the smoke detectors) tomorrow, rather then tonight, for tomorrow’s action depends on a success tonight, and 2 vs. 3 candles seems insignificant compared to familiarity with the action. Although for determining the night most likely to burn down the dorm (or etc.) the additional candles would probably be most crucial, and accumulated carelessness from the evidently 7 arson-free nights could balance any initial inexperience.

I suppose it would indeed take a miracle to light 8 candles for 8 days.

[And it's not worth risking a mandatory Arson/Pyromania Awareness "floor program". Can't we go see a movie or go bowling or have psychological testing done on us like normal floors?]

Doubled SI. Rejecteds I also liked:
"Yasser Arafat Pronounced Dead in Paris" [2]
Linguists Unsurprised
Chirac Reveals Palestinian Leader's Secret Nickname: "Mortie"

"A Squeal of Approval for Avril Lavigne"
Teen Star Fit for Pigs

"Lindsay Lohan, Wilmer Valderrama Break Up"
Pair Considering Sprint, Cingular as Alternatives

"Iran Says It Will Suspend Uranium Program"
Secret Underground Cavern Will Hold Lofted Laboratory

"Schumer Will Not Run for N.Y. Governor"
Pataki's "Relay for Life" Team Left Undermanned

[likely unprintable]
"Coming of Age Takes on a New Meaning"
Beauty Left Unsatisfied

I am my own roommate.

“Excellentissimam virtutem, Crastine.”
“Party on, Caesar.”

“St. Louis, the Gateway to the West; and Baltimore… is in Maryland.”

Well played, Ken, a perfect replacement should Alex Trebek step down.

Continuing in the category “Other Things I Really Shouldn’t Care about This Week”:
These are collectively a crash, and should have a better plural form.
[What are rhinoceroses?]

The season’s first snow is always glorious, but especially following such a dreary rainy week. And yes, I know, it’s not the first snow; but why force it to count if no one else experienced it either?

Noon registration: Anyone considering sections of Diff.Eq.s, EComp, CompSci 2, or (less and less likely) Intro. to Linguistics? [Diff. Eq.s = 01 (10-11), EComp = 49 (2-3), CompSci 2 = C (4-5:30), Intro. to Linguistics = hahayeahno.]

3rd mistake:
3 <= 3
3|111
3! =/= 3

Nothing in this week’s SI for I completely misread the contest instructions; a particular shame since it ruined a joke I first attempted in 5th grade with an ideal setup, only to have been left waiting for another opportunity after mangling it. At least I am getting practice in faux-French collaboration.

‘Monsieur éléphant, while zee life is insignificant, as is zee living of it, and zee outcome of this situation may not be worth zee immediate intervention- mon dieu, who of us can ever tell?- it is not zee place of me to act decisively; but I will allow myself to say that zee ‘cowboy’’ (and by this he meant the Crocodile) ‘will bring about an unfavorable diplomatic isolation before you might say “qu'est-ce que c'est que cette petite tasse là qui j'ai prendre à ma tante de la bibliothèque, n'est-pas?”’

This is the way Tri-Colored-Python-Rock-Snakes always talk.

[And back through the bedroom window.]

Finding Neverland, despite adultery compounded with implications of pedophilia and drug usage, was a sadder “Shakespeare in Love” or “Shadowlands”. Perhaps it’s only a Washington thing, but the line “redskins are defeated” caused a wave of laughter to overwhelm an otherwise teary-eyed theatre. I still think the title would be better simply “Neverland”. Odd seeing Johnny Depp pretending to pretend to be a pirate.

The LinDanny bonding prior to returning from the east allowed chopstick usage to be instinctively taught. And you so owe me awesome points.
“...So we have time for a game?”

Virtually touring, for it is so transcendental.

At the annual Catchphrase game:
“Every woman has one… and she can never find anything in it…”
Someone did manage to guess “purse” before the first wave of laughter began to die.

[I will not even begin to guess why the computer was restarted. I hope no one tried to IM me...]

“Sweet dreams are made of this...”
With linen having not yet been praised, let me now extol the modal sheets, plush backrest, and luxurious egg crate which have allowed my dorm’s narrower bed to make even the diminished hours of sleep so luxuriously restful. And now at home I am able to sleep less tensely on eggshells.

[And also thankful for being able to get into Baskin-Robbins 5 minutes after they close.]

Not exactly sure how Away Messages will be maintained over Thanksgiving. If this is being displayed, likely not very well. Cell me.

[If this Away Message is being displayed I should be at home.

Although, since it means I'm away I suppose I could be out. It's still probably best to cell me. Or, since I'm allegedly home, call me here.

[Or, since I forgot how bad cell service is back home, perhaps IM would be better.]]