“A cello lying in its case…”

When running away to teach in Europe and be sheep farmers, take cello lessons at least for a month.

“…And she fights for her life as she goes in a store / With a thought she has caught by a thread…”

A sheep farmer is less formal than a shepherd. Shepherd has a doctorate; sheep farmer just has a BA in Sheep.

“…A winter melody she plays / The thunder makes her contemplate…”

Counting sheep, and then it’s time to wake.

“…And counting the change as she goes / Nobody knows…”

“Don't scream about / Don't think aloud…”

The pile of dirty dishes in my mind are drying.

“…December clouds are now covering me…”

There are 3 types of hotels: the Contemporary, the Polynesian, and the Grand Floridian.

“They come in ones and twozles…”

Aw. Lumpy.

I can tell this is my bag because it’s boxy.
I can tell this is my bag because it’s Lumpy.

Day 222
Human goes to Disneyworld.
Fish goes to Heaven.

So long, and thanks for all.

Current standings
1) Human
2) Cat

You know, technically this is the farthest apart we've ever lived.
Well, except for Rome.
Well, hm, fine.
Sorry.
That felt different. Because I was being at Wash U, around lots of people.
No, I know what you mean. I feel bad about the counterexample.
It feels farther when I'm by my onesies. Slash twosies.
Like, it's far apart technically on the x axis, yes, but it was closer on the y axis, or something.
Riiight right right right right right. Sorry. Once you get in the typing groove of a word it feels pretty cool. Because they're all nearby, on the keyboard, unlike us.

If anyone is trying to reach me, I’m being awesome for a week.

You know the type.
Times New Roman.

“This is my December…”
Holiday, bonus.
“…This is my snow-covered home…”
Inclement, weather.
“…This is me alone…”
Delivered, pizza.
“…Just wish that I didn’t feel like there was something I missed…”
Massage, the truth.
“…Take back all the things I said…”
Rebook, flight.
“…And I gave it all away / Just to have somewhere to go to…”
The keys, to it all.
“…This is me pretending / This is all I need…”

“It's time to be so brutally honest about the way we know we long for something fine
when we pine…”

There is a wonderful moment when “What music do you like?” is realized to be conversational, not confrontational.

“…It's laid out before us / Who are we to break down…”

Judgment need not be judgmental.

“…And we try / It's too easy just to fall apart…”

On some cold long work-filled winter days, all I really need is a small gift, the merest token, a little sign. One that reads “Do not use microwave while space heater is on”.

[Though I could also use a catsitter for 12/20-12/25. Let me know if available.]

Even though the bookstore had won its independence, the subcorporation had one final nasty surprise in store. The employees returned from court to find their entire receiving department in shambles. For the subcorporation had voided all existing orders as they left. There was only one box of bestsellers in the entire store, only enough bestsellers to meet 1 day’s demand. And it would take 8 business days before a new shipment of bestsellers would arrive.

The Story of Chanukkah as Told by One Bookstore Employee to Another

But another miracle occurred. Somehow the supply of bestsellers grew to meet the full 8 days’ demand, without any loss in sales.

140 characters is just long enough to say nothing.

The 5 most unhealthy words of any relationship are: stop with the conspiracy theories.

A holiday miracle: the oil runs out, but there is just enough left to finish the batch of sufganiyot.

“On the first day…”

7 more days to dance like flickering candle flames, with songs sung to unknown melodies, music accompanying an anonymous voice of experience being cast into the air, around which leaves fall.

You can’t do that on a math test, put the answer is not 6.
Yeah, if you do, you’ll get a not 100.
And then you get into not college.

Not how it should work.

If our life were a TV show, the producers would come over to tell us to stop saying that we’d be so funny if we were on a TV show.

“I simply must go / But baby, it’s cold outside…”

When it’s great to come home from work to a space heater is when it’s hard to bring a space heater home from work.

“…The answer is no / But baby, it’s cold outside…”

Take your pie to work day.

Enough people complained about discrimination so it became take your dessert to work day.

“Did you just write ‘comprised of’? Because I guarantee you meant ‘composed of’. I mean, I guarantee it.”
Did you just write “composed of”? Because I guarantee you meant “composed of”. I mean, I guarantee it. (Which is technically even still valid.)

The only way to make an awkward situation more awkward is to acknowledge it.

There are shredder people, and there are copier people. And I think you’re a shredder, except my mind just Scrubs-tangented into you being a TMNT villain.

Medical show.

The new Scrubs takes place in a teaching hospital. And there's a character that Dr. Cox only calls by number. And another character with an exaggerated Australian accent.
Hubs, or Scrouse?

“When it's over, then I cheer / I'm glad it's only once a year…“

I like listening to Christmas songs only in months that don’t start with D.
(One day in, already sick.)

“…I hate Christmas…”

(Hot + bubble) x (teas + baths)

Things to be thankful for.

[What a Person at a Thanksgiving Table Wouldn’t Say]