Sometimes, on Wednesday evenings, I would go to the Women's Building... and we'd talk.

We’ll be right back after this lobster.

We understand each other in a way you never could! We both watch Lost, both are Jewish, both lived in Umrath, both did W-S Wednesday afternoons, both hosted sleepovers, both secretly dated a troupemate half a semester younger, both started off freshman year so pure and innocent that we didn't even drink and then got progressively more evil with every passing semester...

Cashing out.

I made the switch. I gave up my $1 bills and switched to $2s.

META

How's your evening? Or alternatively, your ears?
“Not wet. Thinking about this band; they sound a little too country for me, though.”
Err on the side of not-listening-to-country. Your non-wet ears will thank you.

Saw Dark Knight. With Heath Ledger’s tragic real-life death, the Joker receives more attention than it might otherwise, but with the character of Two-Face also: the film is about the tragedy of villainry more than heroism.

I tend to like things I like.

I love it when you’re shameless.

Almost as good when I defined avuncular to someone asking what it meant after I used it in a sentence just before it popped up in the quiz, was when freerice defined playa=beach.

I may be a sellout, but I’m not an evil sellout.

Field of Dreams?
“Good movie.”
Just checking. It gets a lot of hate.
“Because of all the fantasy and fluff, I think?”
Because of Kevin Costner, I think. Even so, broken clock, twice a day. <pause> Eh, that’s not very fair.
“Yeah, he was good in Dances With Wolves.”
Broken clock, *twice* a day.

While I appreciate a hidden order to the universe, I don’t think that biorhythms would be satisfactory for me. Periodic cycles are too logical; subtraction from birth too simple. The process by which biorhythms would work does appeals: looking for coincidence of 3 factors, and applying that to events. However, I have found too much symbolism to constrain an order to only 3 factors.

No vacancy.

“1) If you could change one life-changing event in the life of someone important to you, would you?
2) Which do you think is easier to do: be friends for many years, or be life partners for many years?
3) Have you ever walked away from someone you considered a friend?
4) If you had to choose between telling the truth and hurting a friend or lying and making them happy, which would you choose?
5) Which would you rather hear: a truth which will hurt, or a comforting lie?”

The relationship is what we make it.

We each need the other to be comfortable to be comfortable.
“On the count of 3, let's both be comfortable, okay?”

9:06 wake up before alarm
9:11 be invited to Cardinals game
12:25: accidentally take workphone on lunch
1:15 have a rude customer overhear you unprofessionally talking about them
1:16 take a break
1:31 mail a letter to ex-gf
2:00 receive mentoring from Dr. Cox’s cousin
3:02 receive free tickets to a comedy show
3:18 help an undeserving customer
3:58 help a clueless customer
4:49 help a customer despite technical difficulties
5:32 help appreciative customer
7:36 arrive in the 2nd inning
7:55 crave pizza
8:00 find toasted ravioli, Asian Stir Fry, and quesadillas- but no pizza.
8:05 crave toasted ravioli
8:10 find pizza, but no toasted ravioli
8:15 just get nachos instead
9:00 leave in the 6th inning
9:18 talk about customers on the walk back
9:19 be approached by appreciative customer
9:20 have date try to set you up with appreciative customer
9:45 start telling about day
11:37 finish telling about day
11:38 realize that it’s not over yet

“I think sometimes there are perfectly normal-seeming days where we wake up one person and go to bed another.”
I really wish go to bed could take a second object there. I guess it can, like a future form to to bed, meaning to seduce. It's too profound a statement to not have clever wordplay.

It should eventually get there.

“A quick swoop in to mention K[] just enough to agitate me (if I were as easily agitated as she last recalls me) and then Oh Whoops I Have To Go To Bed.”
<payoff on the syntax joke>

It has the hindquarters of a goat, the forequarters of a lion, dragon wings, 3 heads, and a degree in anthropology. It enjoys long walks on the beach, non-smokers, and is chaotic evil.

Free Ted Drewes makes a day that much better.

“I like the aesthetic of it even beyond its prank value”
I like the aesthetic of it because of its prank value.

Punchline

Did you send it to Z[], or did he send it to you?
“I saw it first.”
The correct answer was, we sent it to each other simultaneously. That's okay, we'll practice. You'll get it next time.

Find a theory to fit the evidence.

Item: a box of 3 condoms
1) Of a type sold at the bookstore.
2) The box was empty.
3) The box was sealed.

Location: on top of a stack of notebooks
4) On the opposite side of the store from where condoms are kept.
5) The notebooks were behind a shoulder-high display which blocked sight from the customer service desk.

Time: Saturday afternoon
6) After the last night of an ArtSci weekend.
7) During intersession.

Miscellaneous: 8) Condoms are distributed for free in the dorms.

“han”
…shot first?
…gover?
…d over the key to the safe, and nobody gets hurt?
…kering for some biscuits?
…ukkah coincides with Christmas this year?
…dcuff me, officer; I've been a very bad girl?

“I don't believe in your dreams giving you meaning and insight you don't already know.”
You're talking to one who likes hidden order as well as crypticness.
“Yeah, you and the other INTP I used to know. We had *so* many arguments about dream interpretation. But she is a bitch and can't even put on a swimsuit top the right way. So I win this argument.”

There’s more than 1 way to wear a bikini.

I probably can't put on a swimsuit top the right way either.
“You don't know how to put on a swimsuit top.”
Right. Therefore I'm going to lose this argument.

Brick by brick

Things aren’t changing. Foremost, I am not moving. For that I have obtained many new things, prominent among which is a computer, the requited Eco. Which, being without novelty, continues Away Messages just when I ready refreshed self-discovery. So, appropriately enough, it is time for familiarity.

Youtube is my napster.

Elegant Exception
The only time it might be appropriate to use the word elegant in describing a woman one is interested in is if she is a pianist.

I was thinking, you could tell them I got AIDS. And then they’ll ask how, and you can say from my gf. And then they’ll ask if they can see a picture of her, and you can be, well, actually…
I just said that you ran over a dog.
Yeah, that works too.

With my steps retracted to the point of despair, SludgeFest ‘08 had a happier ending- realizing my camera was missing, I am able to find it intact before further rain where I had unwittingly dropped it in the mud.

“Is this the place that I've been dreaming of…”

Umrath and destruction.

“…Oh simple thing, where have you gone…”

“Who remembers when it all began…”

Orange has become fully ingrained in fashion, foreshadowed by last year in Italy and prior avant garde individuality. With the world painted through no effort of my own, what need I to do; what *am* I to do? And yet, gratifyingly, with the world tending to itself, in a place where it was 2500 years ago, there is actually internal optimism.

“…Before the whole world was in our hands / Out here in no man's land…”